Some fetishes spark from the unexpected. The Wartenberg Wheel began as a medical device but has found a second life in kinky bedrooms and dungeons. Its sharp little spikes are not about harm. They are about sensation, anticipation, and the thrill of the unknown.
Fetish Friday: Wartenberg Wheels Read More »
BDSM, Fetish Friday
Rain hits the window sharp and loud right now
Cold drops chase each other down the glass streaked with silver
The sky presses heavy gray, a weight I feel in my chest
Thoughts twist tight, a storm inside that matches the one outside
Each breath pulls harder as the flood rises beneath my ribs
I sit holding it all, the noise, the ache, the relentless pull
Leaning into the Storm Read More »
Poetry
This episode of Chatting With The Lightkeeper is personal.
A recent family emergency brought forward a challenge to my identity as a dominant. According to some, my actions mean I am not a “true” dominant. In this episode, I explain what happened, explore why rigid definitions can be more harmful than helpful, and discuss how there are moments in every D/S relationship when the focus must shift to partnership rather than roles. This is a reflective and provocative conversation about leadership, care, and the reality of living this lifestyle.
Am I Still A Dominant? Read More »
BDSM, Podcast
Many who create, market, and lead in the BDSM community promote the idea that dominants are always men and submissives are always women based on their products and productions. This narrow portrayal does more than distort reality. It causes harm by erasing the rich variety of D/S relationships that exist across all genders and identities. Authentic D/S connections break free from these outdated roles and deserve to be seen. Bias like this shows up everywhere, shapes how people live their experiences, and demands to be challenged for a clearer and more inclusive view.
Monday Minute: Hidden Bias Read More »
BDSM, Monday Minute
The first drop of melting ice against bare skin is not something the body forgets. That sharp contrast, sudden and exact, is what makes ice a powerful tool in sensation play. It requires no force, no strike, and yet it can provoke a jolt that lingers. Cold strips away distraction and forces focus, building tension in a way that is both psychological and physical. In skilled hands, ice creates anticipation that rivals the burn of heat, without ever needing to leave a mark.
Fetish Friday: Cold Intentions Read More »
BDSM, Fetish Friday
We stand at the base of my favorite lighthouse, its stone structure towering above us.
I have climbed these steps countless times, each one more familiar than the last.
The air is warm for June, but inside, the metal steps creak beneath our feet.
You step ahead of me, the sundress I picked for you adoring your body.
Your bare skin, exposed underneath, is visible as the dress rises slightly with each movement.
A collar in BDSM is not just a piece of material worn around the neck. It can carry many different meanings, some signaling intent and commitment, others serving practical or personal purposes. Not all collars represent the same thing. Some mark stages in a relationship, some express identity or protection, and some exist purely as fashion accessories. Understanding the differences between collar types and their significance is essential.
Monday Minute: Beyond The Necklace Read More »
BDSM, Monday Minute
I waited so long that the waiting became my excuse,
Told myself stories, each one a poor ruse.
Love passed me by wearing dresses of light,
But I stayed in the shadows, too stubborn to fight.
What really happens when a dominant says they are punishing their submissive? My new podcast episode takes a provocative look
Stop The Punishing Read More »
BDSM, Podcast